He does speak.. you just have to listen..

Whats crackin folkss… Well have you ever just had a bad dream and when you woke up you just felt all kinds of bad?? Man I did! and when I woke up I was thinking what in the hell dayum did I eat before I called it a night? But anyway yeah so this dream was about”husband kinda” and I.. like I’m still trying to fig out why on earth is he poppin up in my dreams in the first place… But Chea.. so I woke up.. face looking all twisted.. and attitude stank as hell!.. Just felt dayum awful ya dig.. So I was talking to God.. and I was like. “God, um so today I don’t feel like it is going to be a good day.. I don’t know why.. but I just feel like I’ve been ran over.. So I get to work.. and walk in to go clock in.. and I was just walking through the aisle like a zombie and I saw in the corner of my eye big bold letters “SMILE”.. like where the heck did that come from.. and when I saw that I smiled and knew God was speaking to me.. I smiled.. and ended up having a good ole time at work and the day wasnt so bad after all:).. I tend to be a very spiritual person and I talk to God everyday, sometimes asking questions and end up missing his answer because I’m always consumed at trying to get things done.. but I have learned that if I just stopped and actually paid attention to my surroundings.. He speaks to me, clearly… He tells me that no matter who has left me .. hes is always there no matter what.. And it makes me feel better.. I’m not ya avg chick by far… but God understands my struggle.. and he knows I’m ready to live again.. ready to love again.. and I feel him working little by little everyday.. but I have to be patient.. and stay focused..  AND I will.. no doubt.:).. Oh man! I was at work!(yea sorry I tend to change subjects abruptly lol).. lol why does it seem like I’m always at work when I barely get freakin hours?? lol anyway.. so yea I was at work.. and it just seems like I keep meeting customers from CALI.. hmm is that a sign??? idk.. but yea so I was having a convo with this “W” (um Caucasian) and she was like she was from chico ,CA.. and that her grandson just graduated from Chico State.. and I was about to bust out saying that “yea I know about Chico! My dad went to prison THERE!” lol but I caught myself in time.. and I just coughed when she was talking about it and nodded accordingly..Ok it would have been more funnier if you was there! OH WHATEVER.. It was hilarious to  me:p .. So I guess I’ve became the “joker” at work now.. and thats ok with me.. I keep people laughing and .. I’m always doing mini karaoke to ALL of the songs that come on the intercom.. I just love to sing I guess..:)  and that makes me smile when everyone else is smiling and joking around with you.. even the managers:) It feels good to know that your co-workers are ecstatic to know that you’re working the same shift as them.. I’m  just learning to  love life and live it the best that I can.. no matter what comes at me..because in the end I’m going to look back and say I DID IT.. through everything! I MADE IT!.. I’m getting excited thinking about it.. I know I was destined to be great!.. I just never tried to make it a reality until now…. Watch… feel.. I’m coming!:)

Peace, love, and happiness!:)